Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
well you can't waste a boner
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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