I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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