Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
