You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
