Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
