In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
