it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize