I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
