hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
porn star boner night. come get it.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
