I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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