i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
