it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
You smell like a Billy Joel song
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize