I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
