You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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