The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
