he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
