He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
