therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
