I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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