i jhust puked up my retainher.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Drunk is a universal language darling
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
