I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
why do cheetos always look like penises
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
