last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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