For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
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