I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
