Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
