I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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