The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize