google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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