I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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