i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
