Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
