At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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