ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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