I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
