So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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