yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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