whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
