im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
