At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Randomize