It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Randomize
