is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
