My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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