I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
