apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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