so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
