it hurts more in the daytime
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
