It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
