Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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