so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
