Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Randomize
